and reality returns

Bad day,,some would say bad life,,but no,,late shift was once again dealt with and survived,,so much less work than an early ,but so hard.Hard i hear you say,,yes hard as i know that Colin would be on his own,,i cant do a late and visit,,impossible,,the girls work to late to make it through to their dad,,and friends and family,,well,life goes on,,and reality and life intervene and you have to make desicions,,so lates are done,,i dont moan,,who would care,,but my mind is in edensahll ward with my man,,i hope he can feel me i am there,,,i dont sleep and if i do nightmares come,reffer to previous blog,,the guilt,,i wish i was one of those lucky people that just rail road through life,,without a care for anyone but themselves,,but i see them i know them,,they are on their own and lonely,,but i have family I care and so i will never stop having nightmares,,never stop caring and will always be hurt.This is reality,,so Colin i am sorry,we will be there today ,tomorrow and forever,,but somedays i have no choice,