puppy for sale

One hardly used puppy for sale,,from non smoking home,,full guarantee,,,sold as seen,,no refunds,,asking for credit will cause offence.....................
Im kidding honest,,,its just yes she has slept all night,,,,yes she is the most adorable thing ever,,but walking around the garden,,in pumps,,am i mad but not sure where hunter wellies were flung,,note hunter,im so posh,,,,anyway walking around in my wet pumps shouting ,,,out out,,dog whisperer trick,,or when i think of it was it how to get rid of rowdy teenagers,,any way move on,,,,wet up to my knees,,in most people would be there ankles but hey,,,with purdey my pup walking behind me obviosly thinking,,,wish this damn woman would hurray up and do a pee and i could go back to bed,,,,i swear,im sure i heard her,,and then me thinking darn this puppy she obviously doendnt need so back we both trot,,to we enter the house and she crouches down,,puppy not me and widdles,,,aaaaaaaaaaaaagh,,she is flung out and i go to deal with the mess to stand back in amazement as the offending patch is i swear the shape of a mans dangly bits,,,,now the dilemma is do i photograph it and send it into chat or take a break magazine,,you know like the people that send in the potatoes with the face of jesus on them,,or do i use that stuff,,wash it off,,,for puppy accidents,,miracle worker,,,with guarantee to work or half price offer for heavily weighted sacks for permananent answer to this problem,,,and then you see her little face coming up over the porch glass and think hmm one more chance and next time that sack will be ordered i promise..................