Monday- On the night before Christmas....

Can't believe I'm even contemplating Christmas, but life goes on. I have the girls, you would think they were toddlers. So stocking have to be arranged, trees bought. Not our 7ft monstrosity this year though. I have put my foot down. How many years have I watched Colin saw and chip away at these monsters to make them fit in our box and stand up straight.

The Christmas Tree Adventures:

One year we lashed one to the sides of a play pen. This was to stop it being pulled over on our crawler, Shelley. Yes. The tree was in the play pen. The child left outside the play pen to crawl around and stick her finger in all of the available sockets. Oh what fun.

There was the the year that the girls took Louise's yellow peugot and went "searching" for one. Colin, axe in hand. Well they "found" one. Just lurking at the side of the road, "Looking very lonely." So they cut it down, and Shelley and the other vandal, Christine, sat in the boot and held on to it while Louise drove it home, hysterical in the front.

Then there was the year that Hamish, one of Shelley's boyfriends, was traipsed around the garden centre, as the girls made him show them lots of trees. He was at one point seen walking around with two trees in tow, neither eventually purchased, but to stop the women who had been following them absconding with chosen ones.

The following year Colin came home to find the tree fully decorated, but no lights, as I had to see it done. The lights were broken (as always) so it was fully dismantled and re-arranged as soon as new lights were sourced.

Oh yes, happy memories.

Colin is still vent free. Temperature stable and smiling. Even chortling at some of our stories now. He will be enthralled to hear the Christmas tree saga of 2009. In 2010, the poor sod will be there, listening to our children (Louise, may I add is 26 married and has her own home) decide on the tree, and their method, this year, of obtaining it.